Navigating Activities with Neurodivergent Children: Building Bravery and Community

Creating inclusive environments for our neurodivergent children as they engage in activities designed for neurotypical peers can feel like a daunting task. Yet, this challenge provides unique opportunities to foster bravery, build strong roots, and solidify family identity. So, how do we achieve this? Allow me to share some insights and practical tips, grounded in my own experiences and expertise as an educator and occupational therapist.

Building Community in Our Children’s Lives

Imagine entering a room filled with children’s activities like Sunday school classes, sports teams, or summer camps, designed seemingly with only neurotypical children in mind. Imagine the sensory overload, the unspoken expectations, and the nuanced social interactions that await. For many families, particularly those with neurodivergent children, this isn’t a far-fetched scenario, but a daily reality.

While supporting our neurodivergent children in these spaces can be confusing, messy, or even downright uncomfortable, it’s also incredibly rewarding. It requires us to equip our children with strong roots and a sense of identity rooted in family and faith. With this foundation, our kids can bravely step into unfamiliar environments.

Let’s pull back the metaphorical curtain and take a look at the practical steps we can take. Bridging the communication gap, also known as the double empathy problem, between neurodivergent and neurotypical individuals is a start. This involves preparing those leading the activities to meet our children halfway. Communication is key. So approach leaders beforehand, educate them on your child’s unique needs, and discuss strategies to support their participation.

Reflect on how the group can recognize and celebrate the strengths of neurodivergent kids. Help them find roles that allow them to shine, like becoming a set-up assistant or leading a warm-up stretch—jobs that incorporate movement and heavy work, helping maintain a calm nervous system.

Sometimes a buddy system can provide the support and friendship needed to make these environments less intimidating. Encourage taking breaks to avoid overstimulation, and remember to celebrate each step of bravery with positive affirmation and reflection after participating.

Balancing Participation and Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)

When dealing with neurodivergent children experiencing severe FOMO, it’s an opportunity to teach them prioritization and commitment. Fear of missing out can often be a fear of making the wrong choice. It’s essential to validate these feelings while gently guiding them to understand they can’t do it all—and that’s okay.

Reframe FOMO as an exercise in self-advocacy and commitment. Help them learn to prioritize activities based on family goals, values, and what’s realistically manageable. Creative approaches like a visual calendar can help children anticipate and prepare for upcoming fun while establishing healthy boundaries.

Incorporate games and activities, such as “pick your challenge” or “beat the clock,” to teach prioritization and time management. These activities aid the development of executive functioning skills, which progress well into adulthood. Incorporating movement, role-playing, and even reading about task organization together as a family adds layers of support and fun.

At the core of these efforts is the acknowledgment and mitigation of fear itself. Recognize when your child is physically exhibiting anxiety over potentially missing out, and provide them ways to express and manage this fear.

OT is IN #51 Supporting Neurodivergent Kids in Neurotypical Spaces: Practical Tips and Insights

I address how to help children navigate group participation designed for neurotypical children, such as Sunday school, sports and summer camps, and offer practical advice for parents. I share my personal experiences as a mother and educator and explore how identity and family stories contribute to a child’s courage and belonging. Drawing inspiration from Amber Johnston’s book “A Place to Belong,” nurturing a strong, harmonious family story to combat societal pressures.

In this episode you’ll hear about:

Helping Children Navigate Participation in Neurotypical Groups
Importance of family and faith in forming identity
Double empathy problem: communication gap between neurodivergent and neurotypical individuals
Role play scenarios at home
Focus on strengths
Allow breaks for regulation
Supporting an Autistic Child with Severe FOMO (Fear of Missing Out)
Reframe FOMO as an issue of prioritization and commitment
Importance of teaching prioritization (executive functioning skill)
Create rituals and visual calendars
Addressing fear aspect of FOMO
Coping skills and regulation techniques